Provide some assistance in grammar, and punctuation.

Additional Writing Improvement Exercises

AUDIENCE BENEFITS AND THE "YOU" VIEW

Revise the following sentences to emphasize the perspective of the audience and the "you" view.

1. To avoid suffering the kinds of monetary losses we have experienced in the past, our credit union prohibits the cashing of third-party checks presented by our members.

2. To help us process your order with our new database software, we need you to go to this Web site and fill out the customer information required.

3. We are pleased to announce an arrangement with H-P that allows us to offer discounted computers in the student bookstore.

4. Under a new policy, reimbursement of travel expenses will be restricted to those related to work only.

5. We are pleased to announce that you have been approved to enroll in our management trainee program.

6. I give my permission for you to attend the two-day workshop.

CONVERSATIONAL, PROFESSIONAL TONE

Revise the following to make the tone conversational yet professional.

7. Under separate cover the above-referenced items (printer toner and supplies) are being sent to your Oakdale office, as per your telephone conversation of April 1.

8. Kindly inform the undersigned whether or not your representative will be making a visitation in the near future.

9. It is recommended that you conceptualize and submit your departmental budget ASAP.

10. BTW, we've had some slippage in the schedule but don't have to scrap everything and start from step zero.

11. To facilitate ratification of this agreement, your negotiators urge that the membership respond in the affirmative.

POSITIVE AND COURTEOUS EXPRESSION
Revise the following statements to make them more positive.

12. Customers are ineligible for the 10 percent discount unless they show their membership cards.

13. Titan Insurance Company will not process any claim not accompanied by documented proof from a physician showing that the injuries were treated.

14. If you fail to comply with each requirement, you will not receive your $50 rebate.

15. We must withhold remuneration until you complete the job satisfactorily.

16. We can't process your application because you neglected to insert your telephone number.

17. Construction cannot begin until the building plans are approved.

18. All employees must return their health care packets by November 1, or they will not be able to change any options.

INCLUSIVE LANGUAGE

19. Applicants for firefighter positions must submit his medical reports signed by his physician.

PLAIN ENGLISH

20. To expedite ratification of this agreement, we urge you to vote in the affirmative.

Try your skill by placing quotation marks or italics where you think they belong in the following sentences. Remove any quotation marks incorrectly used, and write "Correct" if the sentence is properly punctuated. You may use underscoring to indicate italics.

1. Voltaire said, Common sense is not so common.

2. Albert Einstein said that the true sign of intelligence is not knowledge but imagination.

3. Verbing is defined as the process of turning a noun into a verb.

4. All of the mailing cases were marked Glass-Handle With Care.

5. Our annual "Fall Extravaganza" is the biggest and best sale in the region!

6. His presidential address was marred by many ums and ahs.

7. Businesspeople often use the term best practices to mean the most effective techniques in a field or an industry.

8. Senior executives want anything brought to their attention to be "high level"; that is, they want it neatly summarized and free of technical terms.

9. Rock star Sting got his nickname from wearing yellow-and-black jerseys that other musicians thought made him look like a bumble bee.

10. Happiness, said comedian George Burns, is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.

11. During the summer extensive changes will be made to the "Human Resources Department."

12. The word secretary has a long and honorable history, but many office professionals now use other titles.

13. The expression cook the books is not what we want to hear when a government investigation begins.

14. Did the manager say that she wanted me to merge documents with our database list?

15. Our copyeditor Angela said that she would scream if she saw another report with the expression "at this point in time."