Problem

When I ask you to listen to me and you start giving me advice, you have not done what I asked.

When I ask you to listen to me and you begin to tell me why I shouldn't feel that way, you are trampling on my feelings.

When I ask you to listen to me and you feel you have to do something to solve my problem, you have failed me, strange as that may seem.

Listen: All that I ask is that you listen, not talk or do-just hear me.

When you do something for me that I can and need to do for myself, you contribute to my fear and inadequacy.

But when you accept as a simple fact that I do feel what I feel, no matter how irrational, then I can quit trying to convince you and get about this business of understanding what's behind these feelings.

So, please listen and just hear me.

And, if you want to talk, wait a minute for your turn-and I'll listen to you.

(Author Unknown)

Directions: Read over the poem above. What are your thoughts or feelings as you read the poem? Who is someone in your life who you would say is a good listener? As a human service professional, why do we put so much emphasis on listening? Why do we caution practitioners not to give advice, but to just listen instead? Why is listening so difficult for you at times?