The Three-Step Writing Process

- Read the directions for each part of the assignment and complete the associated activities by typing in the space provided.

Assignment Scenario

Kevin Peters, owner and sole employee of a XTRMachines Computers Ltd., has a serious problem that could threaten his business.

Over the past 3 years, he has built a loyal customer base (numbering in the hundreds) by selling and servicing custom-built computers for high-end PC enthusiasts. One of the ways he has been able to provide excellent service to his clients is by collecting information on their purchases and storing it in a database. When new inventory related to his clients' past purchases becomes available, his system automatically sends a customized email message to the appropriate client inviting them to check the website or come in to the store for a demonstration. Recently, however, Kevin has discovered that a programming error has resulted in 47 email messages being sent to the wrong customers. Even worse, the messages included some personal information such as customers' names, purchase histories, and shipping addresses.

Kevin has checked his email logs and knows exactly which customers received the incorrect messages and which customers' personal information was compromised. Many of them are repeat customers who have purchased several thousand dollars worth of equipment from XTRMachines. Kevin knows he must contact his clients but is unsure how best to communicate with them to minimize the risk of losing their future business.

Part 1 - Planning Business Messages

Answer the following questions based on the Assignment Scenario:

1. Who is the primary audience for this message? Is there a secondary audience in this case? Explain your answers.

2. Use the method described in the text book to develop as complete an audience profile as you can from the information provided in the scenario.

3. What does the audience need to know? List all the information that should be included in the letter to these customers.

Part 2 - Writing Business Messages

Answer the following questions based on the Assignment Scenario:

1. What is the primary audience's likely attitude toward the subject of this message: (1) positive, (2) neutral, or (3) negative. Explain your answer.

2. Would the letter written to these customers be considered a short or a long business message?

3. Would the letter written to the customers be considered (1) a routine, good-news, or goodwill message, (2) a bad-news message, or (3) a persuasive message? Explain your answer.

4. Which would be the most effective approach to use in this letter: (1) direct, or (2) indirect? Explain your answer.

Part 3 - Completing Business Messages

Read the following email message Kevin Peters drafted for his affected clients:

To: Client Distribution List

From: [email protected]

Subject: Recent System Glitch

Hey Guys-

I was chequing my past history logs a while back and it looks like sum of you may have received sum funny email from me. Sorry about that!

It looks like a problem with the database caused some messages to get sent to the wrong addresses and might have included information about different customer accounts. I don't think it was anything really important though, so their shouldn't be to much too worry about.

I've been up all night trying to figure out exactly how this happened and I think I've got the bug fixed, but when it rains in pours, so keep an eye out for any other unexpected email. Let me know if there are any problems and I'll try to fix them ASAP.

Also, we have a new batch of GTX7820 video cards in stock at great prices. These babies are hard to come by, so come check them out!

Later,

Kevin

Answer the following questions:

1. Is this message written with a "you" attitude toward the audience? Explain your answer.

2. Is the tone of this message appropriate for the intended audience and purpose? Explain your answer and provide two examples from the message to support your reasoning.

3. Idioms are expressions that are not meant literally but convey a specific meaning to those who understand them in context. "Slang" refers to casual forms of expression that are generally inappropriate in business communication. Both can be easily misinterpreted and should be avoided in business messages.

Identify three instances of idioms or slang used in the above email and provide more appropriate plain language substitutions for them.

4. Proofreading is an important step before sending any business message. Identify four spelling or word use errors in the above email and list the corrections below.

5. The phrase "past history logs" contains a redundancy. Explain what this means and describe how the same meaning could be expressed more concisely.