Shelly Gooden

DQ 1

Imagine that you are a hospice volunteer and are helping late adult, terminally ill patients and their families. Use the theories of Lamers and Kubler-Ross to help you and the families better understand and deal with their circumstances.

Berger (2013) describes the importance of the individual and cultural aspects of the grieving process. Although psychological stages of grief indentified by Kübler-Ross are helpful and can be used as Berger (2013) exlpains to create dialouge. It has been my experience working with patients and families that the experience runs deeper than words and, in reality, our ability to process it begins when we are very young as our first fairy tale is read to us (Lamers, 1995).

As a formal part of the medical team I was responsible for a sound body-mind-spirit plan. Finanical aspects, such as insurance, medical insurance, DNR orders, palliative care, living wills were a small part of this. Making sure clergy and family were notified according to the wishes of the patient. Creating a safe environment that empowered the patient allowing them to make the transition with dignity. While some of this might be done by a hospice volunteer much would not fall outside of their scope of practice. However, volunteers can read to those they serve.

I went to my bookshelf and pulled two books I used often in my work with families and patients. The first, There's No Such Place As Far Away (Bach, 1990). I read this book aloud with those I served, usually pretending to read it only to the younger family members but all were present and the results were powerful and positive. I did not understand until now, reading Lamer's (1995) work, why it did. Perhaps it is because the message within Bach's story supports the message I found helpful in the second of the books I used as I served those in this space which contains one of my favorite quotes, "Q: Being alive is nice? A: Yes! And while I am alive, I should live, not slowly die. That makes sense." (Kübler-Ross, 1987, p. 167).

References

Bach, R. (1990). There's No Such Place As Far Away. New York: DelacortePress.

Berger, K. S. (2013). Invitation to the Life Span (2nd ed.). New York: Worth Publishers.

Kübler-Ross, E. (1987).AIDS The Ultimate Challenge. New York: Macmillan Publishing Company.

Lamers, E. P. (1995).Children, death and fairy tales.OMEGA - Journal of Death and Dying , 31(2), 151-167. Retrieved from

http://journals.sagepub.com/doi/pdf/10.2190/HXV5-WWE4-N1HH-4JEG.

Kimbrilee Schmitz

DQ 2

Imagine that you are a hospice volunteer and are helping late adult, terminally ill patients and their families. Use the theories of Lamers and Kubler-Ross to help you and the families better understand and deal with their circumstances.

Kubler-Ross's theory of death and dying states that individuals need to work through the different stages of grief.Each individual will react differently to their individual situation. The five stages of grief are; denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. People work through these stages in different orders, sometimes coming back to some of the stages. The time it takes an individual to work through one or all of these stages varies from individual to individual (Bolden, 2007). Lamers also believed there were stages to grief. Lamers also believed Lamers believed that the grief was an important part of the dying and healing process. Having loved ones around can help not only the terminally ill person, but also the family. Another factor to keep in mind is that people do not always act rationally when dying or seeing a loved one die (Parkes et al., 2011). Having compassion during this time is important when an individual is helping a terminally ill patient.

Allowing individuals time to grieve in their own way is important to the healing process after losing a loved one. Letting family members know about the stages of grief is important, but it should be stressed that no two individuals will grieve in the same way. Some individuals may seem to heal faster than others or be in different stages at different times, and this is normal. Being supportive of the family members and stressing the importance of supporting each other is important.

References:

Bolden, L. A. (2007). A Review of On Grief and Grieving: Finding the Meaning of Grief Through the Five Stages of Loss. Counseling & Values, 51(3), 235-237. Retrieved from:

https://lopes.idm.oclc.org/login?url=http://search.ebscohost.com/login.aspx?direct=true&db=a9h&AN=24884345&site=eds-live&scope=site

Parkes, C. M., Attig, T., Bendiksen, R., Cabrera, F., Corr, C., Cox, G., & ... Wrenn, M. (2011). Can individuals who are specialists in death, dying, and bereavement contribute to the prevention and/or mitigation of armed conflicts and cycles of violence?.Death Studies, 35(5), 455-466. Retrieved from:

https://lopes.idm.oclc.org/login?url=http://search.ebscohost.com/login.aspx?direct=true&db=cmedm&AN=24501856&site=eds-live&scope=site

Tonya Klemmer

DQ 3

Imagine that you are a hospice volunteer and are helping late adult, terminally ill patients and their families. Use the theories of Lamers and Kubler-Ross to help you and the families better understand and deal with their circumstances.

Once a person reaches late adulthood, their attitudes about death begin to change. Late adulthood brings on a decrease in anxiety about death and in many cases preparation begins for once the person has passed away. A terminally ill older adult is more likely to be at peace with their impeding death and has most likely talked with their family members about what they would like to happen once they have passed away. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross is well known for her work in death and dying. She has introduced the stages that are often experienced once a love one has passed away. This theory would best be used to help the family to understand and be prepared for the various stages of grief they are likely to experience.

Having this knowledge and normalizing their feelings can help them to process the loss in healthy way. Berger (2014) shared that, as Kübler-Ross and others have discovered, most dying people want to spend time with loved ones and to talk honestly with medical and religious professionals. It is important to remember that everyone deals with dying and loss in their own way. Lamers theory focuses more on the survivor's experience in losing a loved one. As stated by Coberly and Shapiro (1998), death and dying can evoke ambiguous and uneasy feelings which tend to elicit reactions rather than spontaneous responses. Knowing this shows that importance of the caregivers becoming more aware of both Kubler-Ross and Lamers stages. This will not only help the patient or loved one but also help themselves through the grieving process.

Berger, K. (2014). Invitation to the life span, 2nd ed. New York, New York: Worth Publishe

Coberly, M., & Shapiro, S. I. (1998). Letting go: expanding the transpersonal in hospice care and education. The International Journal of Transpersonal Studies, 17(1), 35-55.