QUIZ

• Question 1. Vioxx, Celebrex, and Bextra are painkillers, and all of them are risky for heart patients. It must be the case that all painkillers are risky for heart patients.

• Question 2. Radio host Rush Limbaugh argues that America's foreign policy is a great success. But who is this screwball Limbaugh? He's nothing but a fascist, sexist, homophobic, drug-addicted moron, who will say anything to stir up the ultra right. Every sane person shuts him off.

• Question 3. Every component in this boat is made of rust-proof material. Therefore, the entire boat is rust-proof.

• Question 4. Either you buy me a new Rolls Royce or I'll have to walk to work in the snow. And I'm sure you don't want me to do that.

• Question 5. Either Thomas Edison or Samuel F. B. Morse invented the telegraph. But it wasn't Edison. Therefore, Morse invented the telegraph.

• Question 6. Nobody has ever seen Mr. Albie walk without crutches. We conclude that Mr. Albie needs crutches to walk.

• Question 7. Floyd Conway has given us his reasons for unrestricted logging in our national forests. But it's obvious why he says these things. Floyd is a lumberjack, and he just wants to ensure that he'll have a job in the years ahead.

• Question 8. During the five years that Clarence has worn a Rolex watch, three of his married friends have gotten a divorce. Thus, to prevent any more divorces, it is essential that he stop wearing that watch.

• Question 9. Tom is a bit of a dunce when it comes to mathematics, and he hasn't studied a bit for the next test. Therefore, he probably won't do very well on that test.

• Question 10. The idea that fast food is unhealthy is a lot of hooey. Why, 90% of America eats fast food.

• Question 11. We know for certain that no armadillos are aardvarks. It is therefore equally certain that no aardvarks are armadillos.

• Question 12. This brick made of 24 caret gold has been sliced into 50 pieces. Therefore, each of the pieces must be 24 caret gold.

• Question 13. Movie star Marci Downs says in magazine ads that the new Porsche XKG is the sexiest car on the road. But you shouldn't take what she says too seriously because she's paid thousands of dollars to make these ads.

• Question 14. Either you buy me a new Rolex watch, or I'll be late for all my meetings. I'm sure you don't want me to be late, so you'll buy me the Rolex. How about that one with diamonds in it?

• Question 15. Dr. Williams cheated Medicare by exaggerating expenses, and Dr. Fox cheated by submitting fees for nonexistent patients. Dr. Harris defrauded a dozen insurance companies by requiring unneeded lab tests. The apparent conclusion is that all doctors cheat.

• Question 16. My dear, you shouldn't hesitate a minute before buying a new mink coat. Real fur is in right now, and a full mink is the ultimate in fashion. It tells the whole world that you have exquisite taste and the wherewithal to express it.

• Question 17. Every ingredient in this new drink concoction is highly alcoholic. Therefore, the drink is highly alcoholic.

• Question 18. Renee Richards argues in favor of reducing the patient load of our nurses. But it's obvious why she says this. Renee is a nurse herself, so of course she wants a reduced patient load. Nobody should pay too much attention to her pleas.

• Question 19. Former President Bush argued in favor of privatizing Social Security. But just look at the man. He can't even pronounce half the words in the English language, he's a notorious liar, and his face looks like it came off the cover of MAD Magazine. Bush's arguments are pure trash.

• Question 20. A few days after Margi joined the Democratic Party she got pregnant and lost her job. Therefore, it's important that you never join up with the Democrats.

• Question 21. Professor Wilson argues that it is absolutely wrong for students to plagiarize their work. But who is she to talk? I have it on good evidence that Wilson plagiarized her own work when she was a student.

• Question 22. After returning from a two-week vacation, Robert turned the key in his usually reliable Camry, but nothing happened. Apparently the car has a dead battery.

• Question 23. The fallacy in which the arguer misinterprets an opponent's argument for the purpose of more easily attacking it is:

• Question 24. It's never a good idea to allow your teenage kids to have a sip of champagne on New Year's Eve. Next thing you know they'll be drinking beer during TV football games. Then it'll be wine every night at dinner. Then bloody Mary's every morning. Soon they'll be raging alcoholics, and the costs for rehab will be enormous.

• Question 25. Hugo lost an arm in a car accident last year. But surely he will get it back. Most lost things turn up sooner or later.