I need these two paragraphs re-written...beef up the narrative too.

INDICATE YOUR MAJOR PERFORMANCE OBJECTIVES:

A good First Sergeant, in my opinion, is someone who can take a mission requirement and formulate a simple, yet effect plan in a timely manner. The plan should be thorough, but extremely easy to understand so the Soldier can effectively read, interpret and execute the plan. A good First Sergeant should have a sound understanding of the Troop Lead Procedures, Army Training, the Military Decision Making Process, and the unit's capabilities.

INDICATE YOUR MAJOR PERFORMANCE OBJECTIVES:

1SG Doe performs above the required Army standards and organizational goals of leader competencies and attributes; this Noncommissioned Officer (NCO) and his/her Soldiers often take disciplined initiative in applying leader competencies and attributes, which results in an immediate impact on all mission, their Soldiers, the unit, and the Battalion; this level of performance is not common, typically demonstrated by the upper third of NCOs.