The Body Revision
Thesis: To minimize crimes in our society, we should adopt other effective strategies, and avoid capital punishment. As it is clear that the death penalty is not an effective measure of deterring crime.
Professor's comment on what need to be revised!!!!!
Please make these changes that's listed below. It very important to make these updates.
The content of this portion should adhere to the requirement of a minimum of 3 or 4 developed paragraphs in which you state your ideas. Since this is the minimum, more development is needed. Also, this is the area not to mention pros and cons, but instead to have the content support your argument. While the information is good, it is important that it supports your thesis. Also, it is somewhat repetitive. For each paragraph, you included an assertion of your point, explanation and illustration, but the use of transitions could be improved.
Please follow these directions too!!!!!
Purpose: The purpose of this assignment is to revise the body of your academic argumentative research paper, which you created a draft of in Unit VI.
Description: In this assignment, you will revise the three to four body paragraphs you wrote in Unit VI. The following requirements must be included in the assignment:
- Body Paragraphs: You will revise the body section of your paper based on feedback received from your professor in Unit VI. Please review here the guidelines for the body section of your research paper: This section will include three to four paragraphs comprised of five to seven sentences each. Each paragraph should be between 150-200 words. At a minimum, this portion of the paper should be 450-600 words (for three to four paragraphs); a body section of this length will meet the minimum requirements of the assignment. Revisions must be substantive and should be made in accordance with the direction given by the professor's feedback. The following components must be included in each body paragraph (in the following order).
Sentence 1: Point/reason sentence: This topic sentence will contain one of your reasons. Sentence 2: Explanation: In this sentence, you will provide information that further develops or explains Sentence 1.
Sentence 3: Illustration: This sentence introduces evidence that supports the reason that is presented in Sentence 1.
Sentence 4: Explanation of the illustration: Because the evidence does not necessarily stand on its own, you need to provide explanation so that the reader will understand how you interpreted the evidence to come to your reason.
Sentences 5-6: Second illustration and explanation (optional): You may choose to include a second piece of evidence that is then followed by an explanation.
Last Sentence: Transition: In this sentence, you will signal to the reader that you will be moving on to another point in the next paragraph. You do this to ease the movement from one point to another.
Be sure to include the introduction and literature review you have already created and revised. Use APA conventions to cite and reference all sources used to support your argument.
Please see attachment!